This is going to be an emotional post. . .since the last 24 hours I've felt every emotion there is to feel.
If you didn't all ready know, I was in my first EVER car accident June 23rd. My car was totalled by a behemoth SUV and I was injured in the collision.
At the ER, they tell me "I just have a 'good ol' case of whiplash.' and to follow up with my doctor in a week.
A week later, Dr says, "Here's drugs, Here's exercises, use heat & ice and go to physical therapy if it's not getting better.'
GO to physical therapy twice a week for the last 8 weeks to help me with pain. It's not helping.
Go back to doctor and say, "Hey, it's not helping."
Doc says, "MRI"
GO to MRI (do not pass GO, do not collect $200 - - but laugh your head off at the grandma, who tells the nurse rather loudly, "I'm not wearing a bra!")
Get MRI done. Wait 2 days for results.
Results come: Disc protrusion on C6 & C7 - time for the neuro surgeon.
My reaction "Holy #&*^!!, it better not be surgery!"
So I cried because I'm scared of the unknown and what the future of all this holds. I'm angry that it's taken 2 months for them to see it wasn't "JUST" whiplash that it was actually more. I'm also angry at the driver who hit me. I feel guilty because I shouldn't feel angry at the driver when it wasn't intentional. I'm emotionally tired from waiting for every piece to fall into place. I'm frustrated and think,"Why now and why me?" I'm drained because it hurts! The pain is different every day, but it's still there. It really bites.
I really struggled with all of this today. I actually said a prayer before my MRI, and my scriptures fell open to this fabulous scripture that spoke peace to my mind & heart. Joshua 3:7, "And the Lord said unto Joshua, This day will I begin to magnify thee in the sight of all Israel, that they may know that, as I was with Moses, so I will be with thee"
God has a purpose. God has this trial for me. (I can TOTALLY empathize with Chunk now. wow. Do I literally feel his pain) But with God's help, He will see me through. I will keep you posted as things unfold. Hey, it can only go up from here :)
4 comments:
Oh Ane.
I am so sorry.
Pain is so hard when it's so inescapable.
Knowing you and your boys I wouldn't have been surprised if this post really was about something and a fan, but I digress (trying to make you laugh, too)
I'll be praying for you. May you have peace and the solutions your body needs. Love you!
I'm thinking of you! I hope you start to feel better!
Oh yuck! Hoping and hoping that you will not need surgery!!
Read Mockingjay again. It will make you feel a little bit better.
I feel like a total jerk. Here I am whining my head off about my life, to you, and you have your own issues. You don't need to hear about all that crap. SORRY!. Hope Disneyland is awesome and don't ever feel guilty or like you don't deserve it, cause you do!!
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